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But it gets better: his ol’ college girlfriend-turned-wife, “Smashley”, is no longer in the picture, as they got divorced last year. Janet, Martha, and the rest want his legitimately bangin’ dad bod, and although we really can’t blame them, that dad bod is gonna be ours… But the moms persist, and convince us to all pile up into the car and go to Thirsty’s Pizza to spend a little more time with him.
After ducking and dodging the THOT moms being thrown his way, Craig Cahn gets roped into playing DDR (huge turn-on) by his kids and we go play pinball with ours.
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We set up camp and decide to go for a hike, and after making several dad jokes about a tree that looks like a butt, we come to a waterfall — a waterfall that looks hella fun to jump from into the pool below. Of course, Craig is there, and after all the other guests leave, we steal away to a secluded spot in the yard to have more tender moments. They could have made Craig some nerdy, scrawny guy who is dorky as hell and can’t speak English very well. So we’ll happily call Craig Cahn our “Dream Daddy” and scream from the rooftops that he is, indeed, the best dad.*except one.
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